| My Life in Lyrical Grace.... |
[Oct. 15th, 2005|06:04 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  numb | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Let Go | ] |
Drink up baby down
Are you in or are you out?
Leave your things behind
'Cause it's all going off without you
Excuse me too busy you're writing your tragedy
these mishaps
You bubble-wrap
When you've no idea what you're like
So, let go, let go
Jump in
Oh well, what you waiting for?
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So, let go, yeah, let go
Just get in
Oh, it's so amazing here
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
It gains the more it gives
And then it rises with the fall
So, hand me that remote
Can't you see that all that stuff's a side show?
Such boundless pleasure
We've no time for later
Now you can't await
Your own arrival
We've twenty seconds to comply
So, let go, let go
Jump in
Oh well, what you waiting for?
It's al right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So, let go, yeah, let go
Just get in
Oh, it's so amazing here
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown |
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| Quiz |
[May. 18th, 2005|01:16 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the music in my head | ] |
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
001.Josh
002. Pyro
003. Juggalo
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
001. pyro8704
002. musicman8704
003. ive only had two screen names… sad huh?
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
001. my hair
002. my nipple ring
003. my penis
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
001. my face
002. my stomach
003. my legs
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
001. German (im fullblooded german)
002.
003.
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
001. being alone
002. spiders
003. the fact that I might just actually possibly be alone in this world…
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
001. Smoking Cigarettes
002. Watching Captain Kangaroo
003. Listening to ICP (or anything psychopathic related)
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
001. My pimpin black Jncos
002. Black Wife beater
003. My hatchet man (always)
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS [at the moment]:
001. ICP
002. Twiztid
003. ABK
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS [at the moment]:
001. “Homie to smoke with” –Violent J –Wizard of the hood
002. “It rains Diamonds” –ICP -The Wraith, Shangri-la
003. “Master of the Flying Guillotine”- Jumpsteady –Master of the Flying Guillotine
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
001. trust
002. a desire to be with one another
003.good sex
TWO TRUTHS & A LIE [in no particular order]:
001. I’m a good Christian Boy.
002. I am a bad person.
003. I am a Sex God.
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE SAME SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
001. face
002. hair
003. eyes (its all about the eyes)
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
001. stabin folk with my hobo knife
002. smokin
003. hangin out with all my other Juggalo homies
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
001. have sex
002. Smoke
003. Listen to Wizard of the Hood.
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
001. Air Force
002. Mc Donalds!!!
003. Condom Tester.
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
001. Germany
002. Ireland
003. Alaska (only during the winter solstice)
THREE KID'S NAMES:
001. Chair
002. Meghan
003. Maximus Desimus Meridious
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
001. Tell my “Father” what I really think.
002. Be loved.
003. Become a good guitar player and actually join a good band
THREE WAYS I AM STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
001. I love to hit that neden
002. I love to show off..
003. Im an asshole.
THREE WAYS I AM STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
001. I put on makeup sometimes. (lol, I had to keep this one the same)
002. I show my emotions too much
003. I can tend to be feminine.
THREE CELEB CRUSHES:
001. Lindsey Lohan (I just want to fuck her and run…lol…)
002. Jennifer Connaly
003. Bam Margera (had to keep that one too.)
THREE PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ:
001. Casper
002. The Incredible Hulk
003. that guy over there. *points* |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 4th, 2005|09:56 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Mosh | ] |
"Strap him with a AK-47, let him go fight his own war
Let him impress daddy that way"
-eminem, Mosh
I heard that, laughed, and had to post it. |
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| ^ ^ |
[Feb. 23rd, 2005|11:07 am] |
Your Miroku! all that matters in life is who is
going to be your next boyfriend/girlfriend and
where to take him/her next. Not to worry
though, because you are bright and you do your
school work. And hey, you even have a fan club!
What Inuyasha Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| One of those annoying quizes. |
[Feb. 23rd, 2005|10:55 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | People talking in EAST | ] |
You're Gothic.
Alone, cold, and distant, you're typically the
social outcast. You often find yourself in a
crowd full of people, while being the lonliest
person in the world, wanting something more
from life. Besides that, you're a damn
creative person, and you're always drowning in
your next "project." You're life may
seem dark and gloomy, with out much detail, but
in reality, it is quite the opposite. You
choose to keep your life rich by burying you
head in books that require thinking, and
writing people that confuses the common folk.
The world is a cold place--And you understand
that to the fullest.
Punk or Gothic?
brought to you by Quizilla
I like the picture.
-J |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 14th, 2005|08:16 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Nothing | ] |
Ah. The one most depressing day of the whole fucking year. woohoo. So excited. Thats all I have to say about that.
-Josh |
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| Realy, I'm ok, I promise... |
[Feb. 8th, 2005|11:51 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | Okay... | ] |
| [ | music |
| | My Chemical Romance- Im not okay | ] |
"I'm Not Okay (I Promise)"
Well if you wanted honesty, that's all you had to say.
I never want to let you down or have you go, it's better off this way.
For all the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took,
Remember when you broke your foot from jumping out the second floor?
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out
What will it take to show you that it's not the life it seems?
(I'm not okay)
I told you time and time again you sing the words but don't know what it means
(I'm not okay)
To be a joke and look, another line without a hook
I held you close as we both shook for the last time take a good hard look!
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out
Forget about the dirty looks
The photographs your boyfriend took
You said you read me like a book, but the pages are all torn and frayed
I'm okay
I'm okay!
I'm okay, now
(I'm okay, now)
But you really need to listen to me
Because I'm telling you the truth
I mean this, I'm okay!
(Trust Me)
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
Well, I'm not okay
I'm not o-fucking-kay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
(Okay) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 29th, 2005|03:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crappy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fall to pieces- velvet revolver | ] |
"Vermillion, Pt. 2"
She seemed dressed in all of me, stretched across my shame.
All the torment and the pain
Leaked through and covered me
I'd do anything to have her to myself
Just to have her for myself
Now I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do when she makes me sad.
She is everything to me
The unrequited dream
A song that no one sings
The unattainable, Shes a myth that I have to believe in
All I need to make it real is one more reason
I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do when she makes me sad.
But I won't let this build up inside of me
I won't let this build up inside of me
I won't let this build up inside of me
I won't let this build up inside of me
A catch in my throat choke
Torn into pieces
I won't, nO!
I don't wanna be this...
But I won't let this build up inside of me
I won't let this build up inside of me
I won't let this build up inside of me
I won't let this build up inside of me
She isn't real
I can't make her real
She isn't real
I can't make her real
This is a great song. Yep.
-Josh |
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| Yet Another Song from the Mind of Me. |
[Jan. 19th, 2005|10:05 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  creative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Rock N Roll Nigger- Manson | ] |
This is my latest song, I want feedback!
Fallen Angel
Like a fly, I'll hold you down and rip off your wings,
Looking down on you from above, your mutulated, desocrated, violated,
Rotting Corpse(Deep scream follows)
Rot and Burn, like all the of rest,
Ill rip your heart straight out of your chest,
Rot and Burn, this hell is my nest,
Repention (repeat x2)
As you lie so helpless on the cross,
I lift you up to me, to look into your eyes,
"Where were you when I "needed" you?"
(pause, break into morbid laughter, speed tempo)
I Never needed you! (repeat x3)
I'll beat you with your own wings
You destroyed my life, now I'll destroy you.
BURN!!!
Rot and Burn, like all of the rest,
Ill rip your heart straight out of your chest,
Rot and Burn, this hell is my nest,
Repention (repeat and fade out)
Thats it, I want comments. (Im only adding the songs I think are worth a shit, I have more, if your intrested, let me know and I'll send you the rest).
-Josh
~*The All-American Antichrist*~ |
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| I fall from grace when I attempt to stand. |
[Jan. 18th, 2005|11:38 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  artistic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Conan O' Brian on T.V. | ] |
If you read my last entry, you already know that I am the new lead vocals for the band Deafening Silence. Ive decided to write some songs, and I thought I would post them on LJ to get some comments. (props to keter for the insperation)
Where is God?
I see a girl made of plastic,
living her life as she may,
the seams of her sould beginning to tear and fray,
She pushes the pins into her eyes to stop the tears,
no love, nothing left but fear,
Where is God?(repeat x4)
Alone in her room, she sits,
questioning her past judgement,
her self infliction, her lies.
"Will I ever be right, loved, accepted?",
she thinks these thoughts as she cries.
She pushes the pins into her eyes to stop the tears,
no love, nothing left but fear,
Where is God?(repeat x4)
Her time is nigh, she has decided,
the tourture stops here,
as she places the blade across her fragile wrist,
she mudders one word.........WHY?
She pushes the pins into her eyes to stop the tears,
no love, nothing left but fear,
Where is God? (repeat out)
Thats it. Everyone, send me comments of what you thought. If you liked it, awesome, if not, eat shit and die, its not for you to like or dislike, its for the music, bitch.
-Josh
~*The All American Anti-Christ*~ |
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| WHO LIKES PORN!!! |
[Jan. 18th, 2005|10:45 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | People in East talking about the perverted teacher. | ] |
Sup bitchs and hoes.
I dont update this bitch much anymore, but thats ok, I dont have much to talk about these days, although....
I am the lead singer of a new band "Deafening Silence" composed of myself(lead vocals), Anthony Freeman(gutair), Scotty Hawkins(gutair(bass)), and Kevin Raley(Drums). Together we form the band of likes of which has never been seen, but we dont call ourselves Tenacious D. HAHA. Enough of this shit, Im done.
P.S. Our latest song is called "Who Likes Porn"
Enjoy.
FUCK YOU ALL, EAT SHIT AND DIE, YOU FAT BASTARDS!!
-Josh
~*The American Anti-Christ*~ |
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| Theres no need for conversation |
[Jan. 4th, 2005|05:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  indescribable | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Burnung Bright | ] |
I feel like there is no need for conversation
Some questions are better left without a reason
And I would rather reveal myself than my situation
Now and then I consider, my hesitation
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning, burning bright
I wonder if the things I did were just to be different
To spare myself of the constant shame of my existence
And I would surely redeem myself in my desperation
Here and now I'll express, my situation
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning, burning bright
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning, burning bright
There's nothing ever wrong but nothing's ever right
Such a cruel contradiction
I know I cross the lines its not easy to define
I'm born to indecision
There's always something new some path I'm supposed to choose
With no particular rhyme or reason
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning, burning bright
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning, burning bright |
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|
| ::Shrugs:: |
[Dec. 21st, 2004|08:08 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Jet- Look what youve done | ] |
Take my photo off the wall
If it just won't sing for you
'Cause all that's left has gone away
And there's nothing there for you to prove
Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
Oh well, it seems likes such fun
Until you lose what you had won
Give me back my point of view
'Cause I just can't think for you
I can hardly hear you say
What should I do, well you choose
Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
Oh well, it seems likes such fun
Until you lose what you had won
Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
A fool of everyone
A fool of everyone
Take my photo off the wall
If it just won't sing for you
'Cause all that's left has gone away
And there's nothing there for you to do
Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
Oh well, it seems likes such fun
Until you lose what you had won
Oh, look what you've done
You've made a fool of everyone
A fool of everyone
A fool of everyone |
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|
| (no subject) |
[Dec. 14th, 2004|11:37 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | numb | ] |
| [ | music |
| | People talking in ROTC | ] |
In the garden,
All of us are the
Gods and goddesses of
Dust and good intentions.
What we work for
Is nothing. Every goal
Turns to rust. My
Bones shatter and
I fall to pieces.
Without my dustpan.
Where is god?
-Josh
~*The All-American Antichrist*~ |
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|
| I know I can be colorful |
[Dec. 4th, 2004|09:59 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  drunk | ] |
| [ | music |
| | steel dragon- stand up | ] |
The show is over close the storybook
There will be no encore
And all the random hands that I have shook
Well there reaching for the door
I watch their backs as they leave single file
But you stood stubborn, cheering all the while
I know I can be colorful
I know I can be gray
But I know this loser's living fortaunte
Because I know you'll love me either way
Most were being good for goodness sake
But you wouldn't pantomime
You are more beautiful when you are awake
Than most are in a lifetime
Through the haze that is my memory well
You stayed for drama though you paid for a comedy
I know I can be colorful
I know I can be gray
But I know this loser's living fortaunte
Because I know you'll love me either way
Look ahead as far as you can see
We'll live in drama, but we'll die in a comedy
I know I can be colorful
I know I can be gray
But I know this loser's living fortaunte
Because I know you'll love me either way |
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| IM A FUCKING ANGEL BITCH! |
[Nov. 16th, 2004|10:53 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | DDR music- 2002 | ] |
You are a Khaos angel. You are different from all
the rest. You are a special breed of angel,
prone to suffer in the world that you are in
now. No matter how much you try to believe that
your not special, you are. There is alot that
you want to do in this world. Khaos angels are
very dramatic, we tend to have the ability to
cheer people up no matter what the mood, and
hold in your emotions. You should be proud,
Khaos angels are very rare to find in this
world of ours... (and yes. you are a completely
different type. Hence the name
What Different Kind of Angel are you...? ( Anime-ish pics )
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 7th, 2004|12:40 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Shinedown- 45 | ] |
tonight was intresting... I went and saw the grudge, it was damn good, the ending sucked ass, but other than that, it was good. I was even scared. It was creepy. I think it was just the sounds it makes. Oh well, anyway, i havent updated in a while, I have my reasons. I dont know whats happening to me, its like this weird feeling keeps flooding into me, and my mouth keeps crooking up like my usual frown, but its dislesic or somthing... lol, Im strange... and Im staring down the barrel of a 45, swimming through the ashes of another life... I love that song. So moving. Makes me want a mentos. Lol. I have not much more to say, and Im rambling already, so Im gonna go.
Loves to those who deserve it,
Josh
P.S. See. My little goth kid icon has the same problem I do. LOOK AT HIM!!! |
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| I was inspired. |
[Nov. 5th, 2004|10:39 am] |
Yesterday, a poet came to our wonderful* school and spoke to us, well he spoke to them, but somthing really spoke to me. I was inspired so much from his work that I decided to write my own work. Ive written poetry before, but Ive never put a lot of effort into it. I sat and stared at a sheet of paper for close to 2 hours last night before finally coming up with this one. Hope you all like it.
I call it: ME.
Not enough room for stopping
the sound of breaking glass and
a body dropping
feeling pain
feeling joy
raining blood
destroyed in a flood
alienated without a doubt
everyday I put in but
I got nothing out
see my hurt
see, I'm numb
sweatshirt full of gore
succumbing to the floor
by myself the choice was made
to save or
not to save
hear the shell
hear the dirt
propelled to the end
sorted my feelings in a bend
if this is what I choose
then let it be
living or not I lose
taste my grief
taste my smile
relieved of time
cry for your crime
I want you to cry
you went too far
I want you to see
all of my scars
I want my body
to be torn apart
so my outside resembles
what you did to my heart
this poem wasnt created for anyone, so dont think it was. This poem was just the feeling I felt when my hand started writing. I give my thanks to Clayton Scott for inspiring me to write this, and I thank kenzie for being my friend and such a good poet. Any comments, critizism, and/or death threats can be either commented here on emailed to me.
-Josh |
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